Monthly Archives: August 2010

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This is just a post

Categories: Uncategorized

that would normally have a decent collection of words after it. If I had an idea. Which I don’t tonight. But I might soon!

This is also a post to say that my Tiger Beatdown commitment is likely going to be lessened soon and I’ll be writing more for my own blog again! Um, hooray?

This is also a post to say that one of the reasons I can’t even be bothered to put up a link post to my recent stuff (though have you seen the cool widget on the upper left? It’s pretty good at finding me!) is that the new job keeps me hopping and I’m remembering why it was so damn hard to write when you work full time; because you come home completely burnt-out, even when you really like your job.

This is also a post to say that the other reason you see less of me of late is because I am ridiculously happy because I have met a wonderful person and we are too busy coming up with ways to make each other joyous for me to have any creativity left for writing.

And finally this is a post to say that I will have real posts up soon. Because I’ve been away too long 🙂

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Reading Habits

Categories: (un)popular entertainment

It occurred to me this week, and not for the first time, that my therapist might raise an eyebrow toward my reading habits. Shortly after I began transition in earnest, she started suggesting women’s lit to me, as a way of starting the process of socialization. The first book she recommended was The Red Tent by Anita Diamant, which I had already read and enjoyed, though maybe not as much as she would have liked. She smiled approvingly and further recommended a book by Kris Radish, who I had not read. So a couple of days later, I picked up The Elegant Gathering of White Snows at the public library and started reading it right there. My public library has some mighty comfy reading chairs, so this was no hardship, really. I chose not to check it out. After about twenty pages, I decided that it just wasn’t for me. This happened again with the next writer she recommended, and eventually I realized that she and I were not going to see eye to eye on literary matters. I started heading her off at the pass by having a book with me every time I showed up at her office, usually something daunting and intellectual like Hannah Arendt’s Eichmann in Jerusalem or Mikhail Bulgakov’s The Master and Margarita. It’s not that I don’t like women’s literature, or books by and about women, however you want to define it. Heavens, no. I mean, I named one of my dogs after Flannery O’Connor and my favorite writer of horror fiction is not H. P. Lovecraft or Stephen King, but Shirley Jackson. What seems to butt against my therapist’s suggestions is the fact that I do have fairly well-developed literary appetites, and some of those appetites are decidedly un-feminine.
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Marriages and Infidelities

Categories: (un)popular entertainment

I’m a bit late to the party when it comes to The Kids Are All Right (2010), Lisa Cholodenko’s comedy of manners about a lesbian couple whose children seek out their sperm donor. It’s a droll movie that shades into painful drama with deceptive ease. It’s good. Very good. You should see it if you haven’t already. It’s a film that begs the question of why doesn’t Annette Bening have an Academy Award yet? All well and good. But it does raise some questions.

From my perspective, there are two elephants in the room in regards to this movie. First: For a decidedly queer movie from a queer filmmaker, there are surprisingly few queer people in front of the camera. As in none. Second: The plot twist that drives the second half of the movie, in which Julianne Moore’s character, Jules, has an affair with Paul, Mark Ruffalo’s character, is a clichĂ©, and an obnoxious one at that. The movie actually does deal with both of these issues, but it’s debatable whether it deals with them successfully.

Taking them one at a time:

While I don’t demand that gay characters be played by gay actors, its galling to see an entirely straight cast playing gay characters in an era when Newsweek magazine is decrying the “fact” that gay actors can’t play straight characters (and why doesn’t this impediment flow the other way? Hmm?). The timing of the movie is unfortunate in this, and it’s compounded by the fact that Cholodenko is herself a lesbian and would presumably have no blinders on when it came to straightwashing the movie. It’s obvious that she’s aware of the problem because she comments on it directly in the text of the movie: When quizzed by their son about why they prefer gay male porn, Jules explains that in lesbian porn, the actresses are all played by straight women. “It’s so inauthentic,” she adds. This is probably the funniest line in the movie, given the casting, but it’s also kind of a bitter pill. On the other hand, the actors Cholodenko does have are so good that it suggests that there were no better choices available.

The second issue is more vexing, given the underlying patriarchal meme that all a lesbian needs to turn straight is a good fucking from the right man. Fortunately, this is demolished by the movie–Jules repudiates the idea that she is somehow straight and she repudiates Paul in the end, too–but should it have been raised in the first place? I don’t know. In the context of the movie, it does rise organically from this particular story and these particular characters. Jules is demonstrably having a mid-life crisis even before Paul shows up, and such people often do stupid things. This is compounded by the fact that some lesbian women actually DO occasionally have sex with men, even once they’re in touch with being lesbian, and this is NOT indicative of some latent heterosexuality (or even bisexuality), so the movie could claim some level of verisimilitude if it wanted. I just wonder if it couldn’t have explored Jules’s crisis in some other way. It might not have, given the film’s plot for Paul: he wants a family and he wants Jules and Nic’s family. This comes to a head when Nic rages at him that it’s HER family and he can bloody well go out and get his own. It’s a terrific moment, and it wouldn’t be possible without Jules’s dalliance with him.

In any event, it’s a lot to think about. Fortunately, the movie grounds all of this in a very closely observed depiction of Nic and Jules’s marriage, the details of which suggest that the movie as it actually plays probably could NOT have been made by a straight filmmaker. The way Jules and Nic behave with each other betrays too much knowledge of lesbian culture, from the therapy-speak they sometimes use to the details of their sex life together. The second funniest moment in the film comes when Nic pulls a big comforter over herself while Jules is goinq down on her: “I’m cold,” she says. “I’m suffocating!” Jules replies. Oh, and there’s the vague disappointment visible when they realize that their children are totally hetero. Mostly, though, it’s a celebration of marriage, and a timely one at that. It suggests that Jules and Nic’s marriage is exactly like anyone else’s marriage, which is to say that it’s like no one else’s marriage at all. Because no two marriages are alike.

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Face to Face

Categories: Uncategorized

So, I feel kind of embarrassed that I clicked on the news links for pictures of the first successful full face transplant last week. I’m not entirely sure why I did it. It’s more complicated than just the attraction of a freakshow–not that I think the man who received it is a freak, just that some of the people who look at him may be doing so for the same reason people used to go to sideshows. This is part of why I’m embarrassed to admit that I clicked the link. But not all of it.

I’m fascinated by plastic surgeries. I’ve spent hours looking at the before and after pictures of people who have received facial feminization surgeries. I’ve even had consults myself. FFS is kind of a raw nerve for me. On the one hand, I don’t actually think I need it. On the other, I like the idea that it would reduce the chances of random people identifying me as trans. I think my motives in this are similar to C. L’s motives for getting breast implants (as detailed in her interview here). There are times when I’m sure that this is the crazy part of my brain talking, because I know perfectly well that I look fine. If you saw me on the street, you probably wouldn’t think twice. Be that as it may, when I look in the mirror every morning, I see the male face I wore for a couple of decades staring back at me. I don’t know that bankrupting myself on FFS would even change that perception for me. It’s all in my head, but the impulse remains.

All of which got me thinking about Eyes Without a Face, the great 1960 French movie about a mad plastic surgeon who kidnaps and murders women to harvest their faces in a vain attempt to restore his own daughter’s ruined face, and how it completely demolishes the beauty myth as an instrument of patriarchy. The movie portrays an attempt to enforce a standard of beauty by force. The recipient of our mad doctor’s radical treatments never asked for them. At the end of the movie, she retaliates against her oppressors and wanders into the night.

It goes without saying that Eyes Without a Face is a ghastly movie if you’re even a little bit squeamish. It’s notorious for its scenes of surgical gore, expertly faked. It looks real and it’s filmed with a striking clinical clarity and dispassion. It’s less obvious that this is a feminist movie, given the outrageous violence perpetrated against women in it. But it is. It’s an indictment of what patriarchy values in women: beauty and obedience. During most of the film, Edith Scob’s character wanders through her father’s palatial mansion with a featureless mask. To the world, she’s dead. The combination of this plot point and the visual of the mask suggests that a woman without beauty is a woman without identity. There are persistent images of animals in cages–especially birds–that further suggest that Scob is imprisoned by her father’s obsession and that her function is decorative, like a songbird. The actual depiction of Scob’s disfigurement suggests the horror patriarchy feels for the physical bodies of women, though it’s greatly exaggerated for effect. Also built into the fabric of the film is the doctor’s accomplice, a nurse played by Alida Valli. Her character is a stand-in for the way that patriarchy co-opts women themselves as enforcers of unrealistic beauty standards.

Trans women feel that enforcement more keenly than most, I think. We’re sometimes held to an impossible standard relative to cis women in order to even be accepted as women, so I feel for Christiane Genessier, the character in Eyes Without a Face, because she’s an avatar for anyone who submits to the surgeon’s knife in order to have her identity as a woman, or even as a person, validated.

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Love and Rockets (Are Two Things That Crash)

Categories: all about me, intellectualisimus, silly blather

Right, ducks, so when last we left off, which was–Christ on a pontoon, over a month ago–your correspondent, C.L. Minou, was in love! Or like! Or crush! Something!

Well, anyway. Hey, guess what! It worked out. Kinda. Sorta. For a bit. Okay, a couple of good weekends. But it turns out that she–

What? Yes, ducks, are there questions? It’s true, I date girls now. Girls are cool.

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